Most Definitely NOT on the Top

No one will ever be on the top.

I say this with much humility, it had never crossed my mind that I am one of the best in my town let alone the entire country. Not for a second.

Though my actions may seem to be, but I am not. I am a humble man.

Actually the fact that I am saying this makes everything sound the exact opposite.

I would say I am a subconscious snob. Most of the time I regret and am ashamed of my actions seconds later.

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I felt extra nervous that day. Almost like the feeling I always have whenever I am about to meet my baby D.

Perhaps I had found the ONE. The almost perfect workplace that I had always wanted to work in.

With a bit of previous experience in introducing my hometown, Ipoh to some cute and shy Australian boys back in my secondary school days, I thought I did not need much practice.

As expected, I did not cover the food part, which Ipoh is inevitably famous for, and got silenced by the interviewers' questions about food. Good thing I managed to save my pride from shame with a bit of knowledge about Ipoh's attraction sites. Phew...

 I always thought I could out-play the interviewers with, what I thought then was sufficient knowledge in Interview Psychology. I was wrong. I could not even control my own emotions and what was stirring inside of me. I stammered and went blank for the first few questions.

When asked about my 2 strong, positive, unique points about myself, I beat around the bushes, mentioning that I am a FLAMBOYANT person, basically an attention whore, when I want to or whenever my friends are around me, because that is where I get my courage from, most of the time.

 I went on to my second strong point, WHICH I COULD NOT THINK OF. I do not think highly of myself, remember? LOOK UP! *coughs* Being curious, INQUISITIVE and willing to learn was what I meant to say, but Mr Bean (One of the interviewers) said I was nosy, which he thought could be a bad thing.

Reluctantly, I spitted out words or sentences about myself. Going around the fact that I have a preference which is different from the society's "normality", but not giving them the pearl. I mentioned something about living 2 lives and be confident when I am expected to be AND *POOF!* Mr Bean did his magic and chanted his spell on me being an introvert but showing to others that I am an extrovert, INDECISIVE! BULL'S EYE! He wanted to ask for a confirmation if what he said was true. I merely nodded and murmured abashedly, yes.

I then, told the tale of me, failing in managing the crew from the Voyager Board, like how I had recited to the teacher adviser many times, in hope to get her true advice. My intentions were good, I only wanted to satisfy everyone. *POOF!* "STUBBORN! YOU THINK YOU'RE RIGHT, YOU'RE RIGHT! Everyone else is wrong! Am I right?" A guffaw was what I answered him.

I walked out of the door forgetting that I ever had spines at the back of my neck.

*rings*

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What lies on the top depends on me.  I decide its colour, texture and taste.

What lied on top that day was truly impressive and a privilege for me to have witnessed with my own flesh and lots of sweat.